Well, not really….Mexico is the media event of the year since aul JG slipped
off the mortal coil, not to join This Mortal Coil y’understand, but she dead, I think ya get it, do ya? Anyway.
Mexicans are getting bad press at the moment. You would swear that this big fat disease was an entire nation’s fault. What you gotta love about the internet is the speed at which that breed of people who send jokes about pigs and how swine flu developed actually get their crap jokes moving. In reality, this is a far bigger pandemic. The speed with which it hits my Inbox makes me cower with fear…I already feel ill. If only there was a ‘reply to source’ button on the browser. Or a button where you could electrocute someone confident enough to forward a joke to you. If you think it’s funny, well fair enough. If you think it’s worthy for me to read, well fair enough. BUT, with a push of a button, I can make your arse hairs singe. Now, that’s justice….
Anyway the next time someone sends me a joke that isn’t funny enough to be regarded as FUNNY, and isn’t offensive enough for me to send to the Blue meanies, just wait. You will be walking around the house on a beautiful summer’s day, delighted with your existence. A butterfly will fly through the window. You will marvel at its beautiful colours as it dances against the stippled light. It will land on your hand and you will smile. The radio will come on and your favourite song will chime throughout the house. You will feel the urge to cha-cha. Nobody’s watching. Confidence will soar. Your heart rate will accelerate and the endorphins will push you to a point of exhillaration unknown to you since early childhood. The doorbell will ring and you will be delighted, A FRIEND, A FRIEND.
You will open the door and you will go deathly pale as ENYA will be standing there, covered in blood and holding a cordless curling tongs in her scaly hands…don’t say I didn’t warn you!
Anyway, here are Rodrigo y Gabriella, Ireland’s most famous Mexicans since Abrakebabra. And what’s more, if we are talking pandemic…who gave the world Irish pubs, well, ha, who motherfucker?