Opened the post this morning and while tearing up my Vodafone spam, I stopped, read it and realised that
I am far to much of a depressed little munki to buy any of their products. Their target demographic are people who are happy ALL the fucking time. People who have 1,000 of the bestest friends you could ever possibly have. People who can’t even work because of the amount of time they spend replying to fun messages, organising events and being FUN! People wearing up-to-date fashions who listen to the latest happening music (probably some dirge from Snow Patrol). People who seem to have absolutely no elderly contacts on their phone, no doctor or vet’s phone number. Yet, I have the phone number of the tiler who tiled my floor 10 years ago, who I will never call again in my life but feel comforted that when I scroll down my contacts list, there is a person I y’know could ring if I wanted to. If I was lonely an all.
Anyway, it’s Monday and I’m unda too much pressure. This post is going out to all my skiing buddies, if I had any skiing buddies. If I did, we’d drink WKD and have japes, yes we would, but eventually I would go all Foxy Knoxy on their asses!
Here’s the greatest song about rain ever. The Beta Band would not ring their tiler at 4 in the morning for a chat, would they? Well, would they?